Elementary My Dear 04.23.2013 D.G.

Good day my Brothers & Sisters; and if you're receiving the word in the night-hour, good evening.

As I now look upon you all, I see all kinds of folks; lawyers, doctors, social workers, landscapers, cashiers. Some of you may be accomplished in your respective fields, and some of you may still be on your way. Some of you have masters degrees; other's, just bachelors or even high school diplomas. A few of you stand before me now with immense pride, thinking your educational background or occupational success makes you more equipped to fight this war. And if so, you're sadly mistaken.

Family, I'm telling you right now that all the books in the world mean nothing in the war against hoes. The most educated individuals still find themselves within a hoe's reach.

On this battlefield, a man's wisdom can only serve as his armor, and may his knowledge of the truth act as a thunderous sword... cutting through the shit-storm that hoes hail upon us all.

Today's word is directed to the Sisters of the congregation. Today's word is directed to the wives, fiancés, and girlfriends of the congregation. The "battlefield nurses" as I like to call them - the women who pick up the pieces and repair men who have been shredded by hoes and their destructive carnage. Some!... may argue they are the heroes of this war against hoes, but I beg to differ - The Reverend Stacey MoonWalker II believes they have equally contributed to the genesis of this hoe plague...

My Sisters! How well do you know your ABC's? I'll ask again.... How-well-do-YOU-know... YOUR ABC's?

Now I'm not talking about the ABC's you learned in school. I'm preaching about the ABC's of your relationship - the fundamentals of your man's desires.

You see for a woman to combat the world wide effects of Hoe-ism, she must be confident in her knowledge of her man.

Men are simple, and that is no stereotype. We are simple creatures when it comes to fulfillment.

You see, although there are twenty six letters in the alphabet, men only give a damn about A, B, and C - THAT IS ALL!!

I bet you never thought it was that easy to create that tunnel vision!! And some of you, still, right now, now are whispering to yourself, "The Rev is full of shit"... mmmhhhmmm.

Well first, watch ya mouth! And secondly, open ya ears.... You see a woman will usually be so caught up on aaalllllll the things they do for their significant other, keeping count, not realizing that they're doing aaalllllll this extra activity on their own accord - doing D through Z on their own accord... ignoring the fact that A,B, and C are the only factors that truly matter. Now each man's ABCs may differ. One must discover the ABCs in your specific relationship - meaning outside advice may not apply. I need you to leave here today with the understanding that D through Z is greatly appreciated, BUT your man did not ask for that; D through Z is not, and was NEVER on his list of critical concerns. His list was quite simple; A, B, and fucking C! - THAT IS ALL!! If you only focused on ABC, and stopped doing D through Z, would he notice? Yes, but he ultimately would not give a damn because his fundamental needs are being fulfilled. Let "D" stand for "Damn", and you need to realize that he doesn't give a "D" (Damn) because he simply does not have one to give. He only has A,B, and fucking C! - THAT IS ALL!! 

So from now on, do not look surprised as you're breaking your back, doing D through Z, and you suddenly realize your man's head is on a swivel everywhere he goes... being taken advantage of by hoes! Cuz you know what... HOES KNOW THEIR ABC's... oooohhh like a muthafucka baby! They don't know a damn thing about D through Z - that's too much work for a hoe to even fathom. Even so the only people who are baffled by a hoe's inability to perform D through Z are other women who can't even perform ABC... seemingly, other women; and to be more specific... YOU BITCH! Don't eyeball me like that Sister Jay! You know damn-well where Brother Jay really was last Saturday.... but I digress...

All I'm saying is... don't spend too much time judging these hoes, when you should be befriending these hoes, and learning hoe-tactics. "Love thy enemy"... "Keep your friend's close, and your enemies even closer... just not at the house."

These hoes today are taking advantage of your clear lack of knowledge and your ignorance of the fundamentals in  regards to your personal relationship. But don't feel too threatened ladies. Hoes don't want your man... just the time he's willing to share.

Get on your job!!

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A hoe ain't nothing but a lost soul, and it's time to bring them BACK to civility!!! 

Farewell & Stay Strong!

- Rev. Stacey MoonWalker II

Shame On A Brother 04.17.2013 D.G.

Good day my Brothers & Sisters! And if you're receiving this word in the night-hour, Good Evening.

Would everyone please reach beneath your seats; you will find your very own Hoe-In-Hand Guidebook... You're Welcome!

Today, I would like to read to you from the Book of the Bitch-Nukka:Chapter 6:Verse:22...

"She showed me things that I have never seen. She yearned for me to do things I have never known. The mere fusion of her words & tone in which she whispered upon my ear gripped my inner being. Although I was engaged, I knew from that very moment, I was in love this other woman."

I'm going to give ya'll a moment to let that set in a bit before I continue...

Now let us examine this bitch-nukka's testimony. I say let us examine him! And not judge him! Because none of us were born with the bitch-nukka-vaccine. We've all been bitten by the twat-bug once or twice, for the power that lies between a hoe's legs has been known to move mountains! And a hoe's vaginal courtroom grants immunity to no one! 

The story of Demarcus Taylor is one of a tortured soul. This fallen soldier once slaved to save paycheck after paycheck after paycheck to purchase the engagement ring of his woman's dreams. He slaved to save paycheck after paycheck after paycheck to purchase his woman's dream house. He slaved day & night for one reason and one reason only - to secure a bright & hopeful future with the woman whom he longed to be his wife... but "She" had other plans for him.

"She", being the hoe who watched from a distance. "She", being the predator who stalked her prey. "She", being the one who would be the ultimate downfall of what was supposed to be a match made in heaven. And it all started with a smile and a "Hi".

"Hi."

That's all it took! 

That's aaaallll it took to take Demarcus out of his tunnel vision. For years, all he cared about was his woman. For years, all he loved was his woman. For yeeeeaaars! all he could see was his woman, !UNTIL! the perfect hoe popped her hoe-ass-face in his tunnel of love - the perfect hoe, with her perfect eyes, and her perfect mouth engaged his loving soul with a single word... "Hi".

It is here that we are able to witness Demarcus' true strength. To say that he had been faithful & committed all those years would be the stretch of a lifetime. Those blessed with divine vision can see Demarcus clearly for the bitch-nukka he really is. It is impossible to call him a "good man" for this "good man" simply had not been tested!... HE SIMPLY!-HAD NOT!-BEEN TESTED!

The strength of a man can only be measured by the outcomes of his battles! And upon his first true test, he failed miserably! 

So let this be a lesson to my Sisters out there - you may claim you want a "good man"; you may claim you don't want a "ladies man"; you may claim to want someone who has always been "grounded" - but what you fail to realize is, that at the same time, you're claiming to want a man who has been "untested". And when the day comes for your "good man" to receive his test, you better pray to the Almighty Himself that he has his Night Vision Goggles on. And let thy spare no shred of honesty when I say - tis very rare for an untested man to be able to see a hoe for what she really is... for the way of the hoe is one of what? Strategy! Tragedy! and Disappointment!

To an untested man, a hoe's look is pleasurable; a hoe's scent is fulfilling; a hoe's touch is earth-shattering; a hoe's kiss is inspiring.... OOOOOHHHH! A hoe is a magical muthafucka!!! And to an untested man, she is one of a kind! 

But to a seasoned veteran in this war, like myself, a hoe ain't !NOTHIN! but another lost soul. And with aaaaaalll my God given strength, I shall look down upon the wicked eyes of a hoe and let it be known!! "Hey!!! I... See... You!"

And as today's word concludes, let us leave singing the words of our own Brother Dr. Andre Young (Click).

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A hoe ain't nothing but a lost soul, and it's time to bring them BACK to civility!!! 

Farewell & Stay Strong!

- Rev. Stacey MoonWalker II

PSA From The Foundation 04.16.2013 D.G.

"There is a war going on outside. A war that no man, woman, nor child is safe from. These hoes have now brought it to our door steps. Tis not the season to look the other way! Tis the season to engage in mortal combat! We must finish them!!! These hoes must not know the taste of victory! May they only know the taste of sweat & disdain. Farewell Family!"

- Rev. Stacey MoonWalker II

Testimony I: Strength From Within 04.16.2013 D.G.

Greetings! Salutations! And Good Morning! As I look around the congregation, I can only smile.

It makes me smile to see new faces each week; to hear new testimonies each day. Just last week, a Brother walked up to me with tears in his eyes and gratitude in his heart. His tears were those of joy... an-an-and FULFILLMENT! For the Lord had blessed him with his very own pair of Night Vision Goggles! He admitted to being scared & hesitant at first. He didn't know whether or not he was ready to take a look at his own woman with his new found vision! Although he claimed to be down for the cause... FEAR had infiltrated into his temple! So he journeyed to the package store; came home, and poured himself a cup of that liquid devil, and then it hit em! OOOhhhhh it hit em good & hard!

He recalled how he once sat in the front row as Rev. Stacey MoonWalker II declared, "... for the war is not for the bitch-nukka... tis nnnnNNOT for the bitch-nukka!!!"

The next day, after work, he went on over to his woman's apartment; patiently awaiting her arrival with a recording device.

Now Family! As you listen to this clip, you need not judge his methods, but applause him and recognize his strength from within. Brother, please come forth with the recording...

Recorded Testimony (CLICK HERE)

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As we part ways once again, remember Brothers & Sisters...

A hoe ain't nothing but a lost soul, and it's time to bring them back to civility!!! 

Farewell & Stay strong!

- Rev. Stacey MoonWalker II

N-V-G 04.08.2013 D.G.

Brothers, Sisters, Family & Friends... I want to ask you a question...

When was the last time you had your eyes checked? Mmmph. Can you remember? And if you can recall your last appointment, how good did the optometrist say your vision was? Mmmph... 20/20? 15/18? 10/12? Let me see by show of hands, how many of you were told you had perfect "20/20" vision?

What if I were to tell you... no matter how strong science says your eyes are... you can still potentially be hoe-blind! Aaaaaawwww my Brothers & Sisters, this is some scaaaaaaaary !shit!

What if I told you, "YOU CAN STILL BE PO-TEN-TIAL-LY... HOE-BLIND!"

You see my Family! The hoe organization has evolved far passed the technological advances of mankind. The Almighty has only blessed a finite number of individuals with the tools needed to see a hoe for what that hoe really is. The average citizen may be able to spot the average hoe if lucky, but the eyes of the average citizen is no match for the advanced social camouflage of today's "super hoe"... a.k.a. the "extraordinary hoe."

I'm here to tell you that if you haven't seen a hoe today, then you need to get your vision checked! I'm here to tell you today that, throughout your workday, if you can honestly say you have not come across a hoe in the last 3 hours, then you need to get your vision checked... Statistics illustrate that every 19.14 seconds a hoe somewhere engages in hoe activity. So let me further enlighten you...

When you were in your car, going to work today, the nice lady who slowed down to let you over in traffic... coulda-bena-hoe.

When you were on the bus this morning, and you gave your seat to that sweeeeeeet sweet old lady who could barely stand on her own two feet... coulda-bena-hoe.

When you woke up this morning! Took a shower! Brushed your teeth! Spit in the sink! and wiped your  cracked chapped ass lips while looking in the mirror!... could-have-been-a-mutha-fuckin-hoe!

THAT'S RIGHT! DON'T YOU KNOW IT! Some of ya'll are sitting there right now, in complete denial, not realizing, that you too, have hoe tendencies.

But you can't see it, can you? And that's the shame. You were losing the war against hoes long before the war even started... due to your inability to recognize the enemy that stood before you.

As it is written... Hoes are the most comfortable in the darkest of places; for hoes function at peak in the darkest of corners. They live in the dark. They feel safe in the midnight hour. They operate knowing that they can not be seen, therefor the hoe is free to do whatever the hoe feels like doing without fear of any ramification.

Well it's time we smarten up. It's time to get sophisticated with our approach people... It is time to strap on your Night Vision Goggles, walk right up to a hoe, take a hoe by the hand, and say, "Hey! I see you!"

OOOOOOOOHHH WAIT TIL YOU SEE THAT HOE'S FACE! when the hoe realizes the jig is up! And I will state it again, "... the way of the hoe is one of strategy, tragedy, and disappointment", so do not be surprised if the hoe drops the dick, plays dumb, and gives you the "I have no clue know what you're talking about"-face. Do not be startled; just let that hoe know, "Hey hoe... I see you!"

Even then, that hoe might try to put on the performance of a lifetime, denying any & all hoe-activity, and then that's when you let her know, "HOE, I GOT NIGHT VISION GOGGLES!! I SEEN AAAAALLL THAT SHIT!"

OOOOOOOOHHH WAIT TIL YOU SEE THAT HOE'S FACE!

And right there... in that very moment... the hoe has a decision to make. To accept your hand and follow you back to civility... or... scurry to another dark corner, hoping & praying the next man has yet to receive his pair of Night Vision Goggles.

Go out! And get you a pair!!

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As we part ways once again, remember Brothers & Sisters...

A hoe ain't nothing but a lost soul, and it's time to bring them back to civility!!! 

Farewell & Stay strong!

- Rev. Stacey MoonWalker II

Thou Shall Not Judge 04.04.2013 D.G.

Who are we to judge? Think about that question for a second. Let that question sink in.

Who are we to judge?... Who are WE to judge THEM?

Are we perfect? Are YOU perfect?... No, you are not.

... and neither are these hoes!

A lost soul once looked me in my eyes and cried, "Hoes are people too my n****."

And as I looked back at this hoe, I stared deep into her soul. I saw pain. I saw discomfort. I saw self-pity. But I also saw something else. I saw hope. Yes, I know it's hard to believe my Brothers & Sisters, but yes... I saw hope for this young hoe. This hoe could be saved! This hoe could brought to Salvation! This hoe could be brought BACK TO CIVILITY!!! And right then & there knew that I, Reverend Stacey MoonWalker II, would be the one to save this low-life skanky decrepit ass hoe!! Oh I knew I was in for the battle of my life. For this hoe was dangerous, maybe more dangerous than the ones before her.

"Hoes are people too my n****." - Some of you might laugh... snicker... some of ya'll might even suck your teeth, but NOT I! I shall not judge this hoe because this hoe has shown herself. She has revealed herself. And what makes this hoe so dangerous is that she is fully conscience... fully aware of her hoe ways. The statement "Hoes are people too my n****" shows RECOGNITION!! She has accepted who she is... and with the Lord in my heart... so have I. I looked that hoe in the eyes and said, "I accept you." Then I gave her a hug.

OOOOHHHH YOU SHOULD'VE SEEN IT!!! This hoe didn't know what hit her! Brothers & Sisters, that hoe wept! That hoe cried on my shoulders for almost 30 minutes! She had never witnessed such kindness, such compassion. I had changed her life... or at least that is what I thought. You see, I as I said before, the way of the hoe is one of tragedy and dissapointment. For this hoe, in the midst of a pure & genuine moment, tried to play on my compassion. As she lifted her head from my shoulder, the hoe attempted to kiss me on the lips.

And as her lips drew closer to mine, my hand drew closer to her face. I firmly grabbed her by the jaw, and I said, "No!... Nnnnooo! No! No! No! No! No! NO! Stop it! ssssssssSSSTOP IT! You don't do that!"

As I gazed upon this lost soul, all I could think was, "THE NERVE OF THIS MUTHAFUCKA!"... for this hoe has truly lost her way... but it's not her fault. Some weak-minded fool claiming to be a "man" probably made her this way.

And as angry as I was on the inside, I knew I could not show it. I had to show poise and maturity. I watched her back away from me with tears in her eyes, and eventually walk away. And as I watched her and that beautiful juicy butt strut away, I softly spoke the words Jesus taught me, "I forgive you."

We can not judge these hoes! For that is NOT our job! We must not give in to these hoes! For that is NOT what we do! We must embrace these hoes! For it is the ONLY way to fight this war. It is a dirty fight Brothers & Sisters! Tis not for the "bitch-nukka" nor for the weak at heart! I repeat, tis NOT for the "bitch-nukka" nor the weak at heart! It takes a Real Man to look a hoe in the eye and say "I see you and I understand".

The Book of the Bitch-Nukka tells countless stories of so-called men crumbling before the vaginal power of these hoes. And each time one failed, it was because he simply started to judge. Once you start to judge that hoe, then your vision becomes mirky; your judgement become clouded; you start to act off your emotions. To judge is is to have emotion, and when engaging a hoe for the sake of HER OWN salvation, one can not bring emotions to the battlefield... for these hoes do not run on emotion, they survive on instinct & social intellect.

The rabbit hole gets deeper! Now look in the mirror and ask yourself, "How deep into the darkness are you willing to travel?"

A hoe ain't nothing but a lost soul, and it's time to bring them back to civility!!!

Farewell & Stay strong!

- Rev. Stacey MoonWalker II

The Revelation 04.03.2013 D.G.

Good Day! And if you're just getting off work, then Good Evening.

Welcome my brothers & sisters! If you're here, it MUST be because you care. If you're here, it MUST be because you understand. If you are hheeeerrrree, it MUST be because you recognize that war is amongst us. A war that goes beyooond comprehension for most folks.

Now, I'm not talking about the war on drugs, no sir! As I slowly walk the Moon, it is obvious America is losing that battle. The war I speak of has been one of the longest... one of the most sacred... and unfortunately, one of the most silent wars Man has ever known... the war against hoes.

Brothers & Sisters! The War Against Hoes is upon us! and has been for some time now! The very existence of hoes can be traced back to the beginning of civilization! For centuries, hoes have been weaving their way through the deep underbellies of society. These hoes are in our streets! These hoes are in our families! These hoes are now in our schools systems! These hoes have even infiltrated our government! Lord knows how many hoes you've encountered in your lifetime. Lord knows how many hoes you've held hands with at church! Only the Lord knows how many hoes have slipped under your radar UNDETECTED! Brothers & Sisters! The way of the hoe is one of strategy, tragedy and disappointment. The modern day hoe is a sleeper cell. She operates on a normal wave from day-to-day, until her inner-hoe is triggered. Could be a song... could be a movie... could be a dessert... COULD BE A WORD! Imagine that! it could be a mutha-fuckin-word! A word like "Thanks".  mmmhhhmmm, now think about that word; "Thanks" or even "Thank You"... words of gratitude. Gratitude - a concept that a hoe might not be familiar with. For a female who might be feeling neglected & unappreciated at work, at home, or in her relationship... the words "Thank You" could very well trigger her inner-hoe. Some eye contact and a simple "thank you" could very well land you between the jaws of a overworked under-appreciated lil lady (or big)... ready to prove the value of her existence... you never know what to expect. Many people never even realize they're victims a hoe-attack until they pour that last shot of Hennessy, and it's too late.

Brothers & Sister! This is your wake up call! This is OUR wake up call! 

This is a Revelation!

The fight to bring a hoe to her salvation can be weary... it's a hard fight! And as your spiritual & social advisor, I will provide thee with wisdom, knowledge, and strength. I will provide thee with the clear insight needed to engage these hoes.

A hoe ain't nothing but a lost soul, and it's time to bring them back to civility!!! 

Farewell & Stay strong!

- Rev. Stacey MoonWalker II